Is it really Friday again already? This week was such. a. blur…
Our week began on a rough note as we received two different sets of hard news first thing Monday morning. And from then on our week continued in a downward spiral as Avery spiked a fever Tuesday night and Z’s bottom eye-teeth have turned him into a miserable, screaming, teething snot machine.
Those last two things really aren’t that big of a deal and will pass…but just added to the already trying week. The first set of hard news we received is not my news to share, but I will share with you the second set of hard news we received. We learned that our sweet little Z will be leaving us already next week. And while, by law, I am not able to share why or where he is going…he is going.
We just got to know him…He just got comfortable…We’ve just got into a routine…and he’s leaving.
Our hearts are divided as we are cautiously excited for him…while also grieving his move. We will so deeply miss this sweet boy…always prancing around the house with one sock on and one sock off, teaching Avery what it means to be a big sister. We are blessed to have known him even if only for one month of his little life.
This week has been far short of relaxed and simple…but one thing it has reminded me of is to be faithful through the unknown. Yesterday evening, I came upon Isaiah 40:28…
Have you not known? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable.
His understanding is unsearchable.
We cannot understand what He understands…finite beings cannot fathom the works of our Infinite God. We can see only a small part of His HUGE and divine plan.
It’s like that cliche iceberg picture hanging in my chiropractor’s office…”Symptoms are what is seen on the surface. We focus on the underlying cause.” Can you picture it!? God focuses on the underlying cause…the overarching purpose…while we see such a small, finite version of God’s plan…He sees the final product in all of its beauty and glory.
A friend of mine reminded me of a comparison she had heard once about God’s divine plan being a beautiful, elaborate tapestry…only we can see just the backside of the tapestry…covered in knots, random threads strung seemingly haphazard…clashing colors and mismatched stitching…making no beautiful picture at all, just one big knotted mess. When we are in the knots…or off on a random thread all alone…it’s so hard to understand what is going on on the other side of the tapestry.
“WHAT IS GOD DOING!? WHAT IS HE THINKING!!!? WHY IS THIS NECESSARY!!?” Are some of the things I’ve wanted to scream at Him this week (unrelated to Z’s move). But as I’m thrust into the unknown, as I’m trying to untangle all the knots on my own…I’m reminded that He is all-knowing. I’m reminded that He is in control. That with one word, those knots are untangled and the mess makes sense. He’s. got. this.
And I must trust…I must have faith. God is telling me to. He tells us all to.
And the well-known Corrie Ten Boom quote rings in my ears…
While Z’s future may now be forever unknown to us…while we may never meet again…and while he may grow to forget us…Z’s future is clearly known by God…He wrote it! And we will not be afraid to continue to trust and have faith as we continue to live out this call.
His will, His way…